When I was a teenager, I loved attending concerts. It was such a special, care-free feeling being in the crowd and seeing the live music.
My parents would take me to go see The Nixons, Bowling for Soup, Radish (Ben Kweller), some Christian artists, and lots of smaller bands that I determined were worth the time to track down and see in dive bars. It was fun JUST for the sake of FUN. It brought me so much joy. It was spending time completely immersed in the energy of the crowd, the beating of the drums, the bass vibrating over us, and a lot more moshing than you might expect. I learned about crowd etiquette, met band members, and went to a lot of events by myself (with a parent sitting or standing patiently in the back of the venue for this noise to be over already)!
I became a mom when I was 21. For the 3 years of marriage before that, and several years after that, money was tighter than you could believe. We made the best of it. Before kids, I worked full time while also going to massage school and going to school to get my Bachelor’s degree. Once I had my first, I did lots of mystery shopping and store audits, had part-time jobs, and my husband worked full-time at that point. We did the best with what we had and our fun was free or close! The mystery shopping jobs provided us with things like free bowling games, fast food, sit-down restaurant meals, rentals at Blockbuster, movies at the theater, free office supplies, and sometimes some actual cash to put toward the bills.
This was a super busy time. I had my first kid at 21, second at 23, third at 25, fourth at 28, and final kid at 30. My entire decade in my 20s was dedicated to raising little kids. This time would not be what you would describe as doing things JUST for the sake of FUN. There were not a lot of carefree feelings. Frankly, I reached a point when my youngest 2 (and probably potty training – stressful!) when I was craving fun. I wanted to just do something for ME that I could enjoy that had absolutely nothing to do with being a mom!
Luckily, my husband was totally on board. He was happy to “let” me go to some concerts. Okay, some concerts turned into a lot of concerts. It started with going to as many Jonny Lang concerts as I could. I had LOVED his music as a teenager (are you seeing a theme here? ha) and had always wanted to see him. So, guess what? That year, I saw him, and the next year I got to see him several more times – and even did a meet and greet!
Other artists I have gotten to enjoy since then: Hanson (TWICE! String Theory was insane!), Pink, Demi Lovato, Deep Blue Something, Toad the Wet Sprocket, Jonas Brothers, Backstreet Boys, lovelytheband, walkthemoon, Muse, we went to a few Jingle Balls and saw lots of great artists there (Sam Smith, Calvin Harris, Why Don’t We, Lizzo), 5 Seconds of Summer, Post Malone, Ed Sheeran, Billie Eilish, Cavetown, Mother Mother, Lauv, Tool, grandson, K.Flay, a few music festivals (DREAMERS was at one, which was cool!), and so many more. I’ve even been that parent at the back of the venue for a few concerts for my kids, notably for Machine Girl and 100Gecs (not my favorites, but my kid loved them and I want to support that love if I can!).
It’s definitely cost us money. It’s cost us time… AND it’s really brought out the joy, the fun, the carefree feeling of being part of a crowd and enjoying that live music. It’s been good for my well-being, my mental health, and my sense of satisfaction with my life. It has reminded me, again and again, that I am my own person with my own interests. Being a mom isn’t all that I am and taking care of kids isn’t all that I do. I am a person with dreams and preferences and favorite things. I love music, I love feeling the energy in a crowd of happy people. I love sharing this experience with various friends and family. Three of my kids have been to several concerts with me. The others haven’t been interested, and that is fine. We are EACH our own people, with our own interests, our own hobbies.
I’ve felt so blessed to have had the life that I’ve had so far. The teenage years that helped shape me, the rough times early in my marriage and motherhood, the devotion and penny pinching for years and years, the move to the Dallas Fort Worth metroplex that changed everything…. and also this time of re-discovery, self-forgiveness, self-love, allowing myself to dream bigger, ask for things even if it doesn’t serve any other purpose than to have fun.
Now I’m in my 40s. I can only imagine the further path of growth, joy, discovery, and possibilities ahead for me. I am so excited. I am so ready. I am so glad I took that first step of taking the time out for myself to just go to a little concert….. My, how it has opened doors.